Saved the Worlds, Saved My World
by BurningMandala
Summary: "Yes, but how could I save the universe if I haven't got you, Clara? If I lose you, than nothing matters. The universe doesn't care, Clara. It won't make bargains. The universe may need me, but I need you."


Author's note: This is cheesy. I wrote this at 3am, sleep deprived, excuse me. All mistakes are most definitely my own. Reviews are welcome, as is constructive criticism.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
Lines from "She Said, He Said" were used amongst italics.

* * *

**i.**

A million times plus more, the doctor couldn't count – there had been so many instances in which Clara had saved his life. Over the span of his eleven different faces and over the thousand years he'd been alive, she had been there. He couldn't recall her always and sometimes he didn't even see her but when he thinks back, he can feel her presence. Whenever a sense of calm and safety would wash over him in some of the most dangerous and scariest times in his life, he knew it was because of her. The feeling was very specific and he'd felt it the moment Clara Oswald asked him to come back on a Wednesday because, then, she might say yes to traveling with him.

At that page in their story, he hadn't known enough about her. He had met Oswin and Clara Oswin and still couldn't find the connection, apart from the glaringly obvious names and the way they spoke. They weren't Clara but they were her echoes. Versions of herself spread throughout all of time and space, living and dying. Dying while saving him, the Doctor. Over and over and over again.

Clara would wake up some nights, gasping with tears already trickling down her soft cheeks, from her terrified eyes. The Doctor always heard. He would stay outside her bedroom, waiting in the corridor- just waiting to hear a tiny cry or gasp of shock or something that would let him know that she shouldn't be alone. He never wanted her alone but she need to rest.

Trenzalore had been so much to handle. So, on those nights, he would rush in to sit on the edge of her bed. If she needed to be held, he would do that. If she wanted him to tell her a story of some of the craziest things he's seen throughout all his travels, he would. He was content saving her in anyway he could think of because she had saved him in every way possible.

**ii.**

He would make any sacrifice for her. If she asked, he would do it. Except one, he wouldn't give her up. Not his Clara, no.

She had been angry with him for jumping into his own timestream to save her.

_I knew what I was doing, Doctor. I would do it again. The whole universe needs you._

_Yes, but how could I save the universe if I haven't got you, Clara? If I lose you, than nothing matters. The universe doesn't care, Clara. It won't make bargains. The universe may need me, but I need you. You are what matters to me and we're safe now, alright?_

She was too weak to fight him that night. It sounded nice, though. His fierceness. He was always so fierce about the ones in his life he wanted to keep safe.

**iii.**

She trusted him more than anything and anyone.

Clara wasn't quite sure he knew what he was doing more than half the time but she trusted him with every single life she had ever lived.

She told him that once and his face had softened, a sad smile gracing it.

_I'm safe, but they all still died. I never saved any of them. I've never saved you.,_ he'd said as he gently held her face in his hands. His eyes had bore into hers, full of sadness and regret.

_You save me always. My hearts. The way I see people and human being like yourself. You saved me the day I met you. You wouldn't run away with me but it was a possibility. Oh, I had prayed to all the worlds, Clara, that you come away with me. You became everything. It was about keeping you safe while still giving you all the adventures you hadn't experienced it. When I... when I lost Amy and Rory and even River, I didn't think I would ever be myself again. Losses do things to you, Clara. They seep into your skin and the burn you from the inside._

_But you saved me. You were there. _

_You're perfect in every way for me. Always brave, always funny, always exactly what I need, perfect._

_You are my saviour. My brave hearted, Clara._

**iiii.**

Sometimes his pouting got old, sometimes it was cute. It was always cute when his bottom lip would puff out just a tad and he would cross his arms like a defiant toddler. Clara would tell him how ridiculous he is. He could be pouting over anything and for a Time Lord with so many resources, he wouldn't always use she caught him reading books like, How to Date a Human Female, Earth Dating for Aliens, and a number of other self-help books, she couldn't contain the laughter that erupted at the wide-eyed, embarrassed look upon his face when he's been caught.

_Oi! _he'd shouted at her. _Clara! Clara, please! _His voice had gone so high pitched as if he'd been caught doing something scandalous. Instead, his outburst only made Clara laugh harder.

_Who's the girl, then?_

_Oh, Clara. Could there be anyone else for me but you? It had to be you._

She rolled her eyes at how he could make something sound romantic and also like it was a burden at the exact same time.

_And for me, it had to be you, Doctor. You say it's always me saving you but I was drawn to you from the beginning, from the start. I've been with you always. Sure, you're not as impressive as you think you are and your snogbox doesn't like me and you have an abnormally large chin but these are easy to get past. I can't tell you what all my.. echoes think before they die but when I thought I was going to die, I thought about you. I thought good, he's saved my world enough, he can be the saver of worlds again. He can save someone else the way he saved me._

_Eh?_

_You've always saved me, Doctor. From loneliness, sadness, regret. From becoming too comfortable in my current living and job situation. So, you took me on adventures. From when I'm missing my mum so much and you offer to bake a souffle with me. From myself, at the worst of times. __You're the Doctor, it's what you do. But you're my Doctor._

_You're my Clara, my impossible girl._


End file.
